Five women so far have called about my ad on craigslist. Which means five women will end up in the apartment at the same time; either fighting to the death in my living room, or all of them deciding at once that the room is a useless waste of space and that I am a terrible person for ever suggesting anyone ever live in it!
How dare I!
I've gotten myself into a bad habbit of making this naan-like pan bread (which CANNOT be good for me) everyday. It's about 2:3 in oil content, the other ingredients being flour, yeast, and water.
I need to excersize more.
Seriously. This isnt a vanity thing..Okay it is. I want to fit in my pants again.
Been gradually cutting down though..
I guess this is gonna be another cupcake/emotions thing.
When I find a new recipe I absolutely love, I make it every bloody day.
Gradually, I cut down, then comes to the point where I can safely 'meh' about it.
It was like that with cigarettes, alcohol, drugs, and other such crap people do to themselves, only food is so universally accepted.
Food to me, like millions of others, is a comfort.
I've become my mother: Hiding away in my own space, isolating myself and not caring about my body, health, or happiness.
My addictions counsellor stated 90% of recovering drug addicts gain weight after a significant number of months.
I havent gained too much, although I've never been comfortable in my own skin.
I'm naturally skinny, but my twin sister was always skinnier. I guess that's why I tried so hard to out-do her in almost everything: No matter how much I ever completed, I was always "Fatty". AND I'VE NEVER BEEN OVER 125 LBS IN MY LIFE! AT 163cm! (5ft 4 to Americans).
My Mother's always been overweight. Cruel and addicted to something!
I feel as though she never did anything to stop my siblings tormenting me because it would mean taking the negative attention off of her for once.
Well, now, none of us have great self esteem, and are withering away in crappy apartments, Rehab centres, Jail, or dead end Mcjobs.
I am not my appitite, or my problems.
I'm just a kid who grew up in a bad home, lost her way, and is now trying to put back the pieces.