Facebook never let me publish it. Reasons I have no idea why.
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In this past week, I'd have two very opposing conversations with two members of my family at different times.
I had managed to come to even terms with my brother, stating to agree to disagree; though I have a sneaking suspicion he's going to hinder off to the same level of being an asshole he usually is when I'm at home.
The other ill-fated-as per usual- conversation was with my mother, from which I had managed to evade her usual guilt ridden self loathed stories of pointlessness.
I haven’t slept well for a couple of days, so now I'm sick.
I've missed two days of work. Bad for the paycheque, but good for the fact I despise my workplace.
I have a job interview today for a small café which makes chocolate.
Coffee and Chocolate: my two Achilles Heels.
I’ve also been reading Edgar Allen Poe, the result being my writing is beginning to take better shape.
I’m sitting on the fence with the whole job thing.
On One side:
Jean’s Reasons for Quittin’ Time!
1. It’s pretty obvious. I’m like a retarded child attempting to play bagpipes in an Elevator when it comes to working where I‘m employed. The training sucks. What’s worse is that my superiors have all ADMITTED the training sucks. When it comes down to crunch time, within me asking whether or not I’m going to actually learn something today, everyone’s ‘too busy’ to show me where the fucking hooks are, what the fuck an MTD actually is, and whether or not anyone actually gives a fuck about merchandising in general.
2. Is it chilly in here? Or….
Is everybody just in a really fucking bad mood ALL THE TIME?!
Yeah, it’s 5 AM. Yeah, you were probably out drinking all night. I understand.
But all I said was “Good Morning”, not in demonic voice from The Exorcist “Yer Mother’s Here”….
Lighten the fuck up people!
I’d never thought *I* would be the one telling someone to smile!
3. It hasn’t been since VFS that I can actually feel myself tensing up when I enter the building. It’s an automated reaction of fear; something I don’t need.
If my body is reacting towards the point of being so frustrated that I actually start to shake, then I know I’m either doing something painful (AKA At home Sewing Needle Piercing) or something I really do NOT want to do.
4. Nine Bucks an Hour. I made more doing the exact same tasks I do now, at a Liquor store.
Jean’s Reasons to Stay.
1. Three people out of the four dozen people working there are nice.
2. I’ve only been there for two months. {But then again, if I’m already driven into a shaking frenzy after only two months….}
3. I can have many piercing and purple hair. They don’t seem to give a damn about those.
Who knows. Maybe I wont even be hired at the café. (Editor's Note: She wasn't!)
Maybe, like almost every workplace nowadays, they’re looking for the Lulu Lemon wearing, sweet to yr face-snotty to yr back type of people, whom seem to be multiplying at a terrifying rate.
I’m frustrated because it seems like every other month, I’m out looking for a job.
I was debating whether or not it was just my attitude towards the entire thing.
Or maybe I’ve just worked a lot of crappy jobs.
Who knows.
All I know is, From this job, I got a cheap printer.
Hurray and Thank you.
I’d live on an Amish farm with no technology whatsoever if it meant I got homemade chocolate.
SPEAKING OF HOMEMADE CHOCOLATE:
I’ve found the dirty little secret behind the ever addicting evil Girl Guide cookies in vegan cupcake form.
If nobody wants to eat Chocolate Peppermint Cupcakes, then I’m outta’ here!
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